fits and starts

SO

so i just finished reading dave shaw’s book “less of everything”. it’s difficult to frame my thoughts because the entire time i’m thinking “i know these people, i know where these places are and what they are like” which is (possibly) useful trivia but sort of ruins everything. so for now they are only half-baked emotional responses with one or two technical points. deal with it.

i like dave’s sentence structure, it is exactly how i form my thoughts which is why i am stealing it to write this review. it is rambly and perhaps i would have thought it was boring if i wasn’t familiar with it; it is impossible to say. it is short too. so maybe it is too short to bore people, again i don’t know.

mostly the book made me feel vaguely uneasy, because i knew it would be impossible for me to judge the story (book? text?) on its merits. but maybe there is a better explanation, maybe i felt that way because “nothing will change no matter what i do” (paraphrasing from the book) but i have my doubts, that is one of those capital b big thoughts that i like but affects me in no significant way.

i did like the book, it made me feel good, but also a little self-piteous, which is my least favourite thing to feel because i don’t deserve it (i think).

anyway, by the end i was repressing the “i know where this is, what it is” thoughts and then there is a bit on happiness that i liked. i think i can talk about this. anxiety (the main character, i should have said that sorry) thinks that he might never be really happy, but he ends the story feeling good. i felt good for him, but nervous. (anxious?) does happiness = feeling good? i have always thought it did, but this story made me think that maybe it isn’t, maybe i have never been truly happy.

mostly it made me realize that doing things is easy and that not knowing why you do things is not a reason to do (or not do) them. it made me want to do things, hopefully they will one day be the capital b big things that i like. that is why i wrote this review and why i stole tons of things from this story to use for myself (like this sentence structure). i also wrote a poem called “thinking in capital letters” that i might post soonish.

you can read the book for free, just search “less of everything dave shaw” and you will find it. maybe you should give him money. he is at daveisok.tumblr.com you should follow that as well.

this is everything. i am so sorry. i liked doing this, send me books i should read and review on my ask page.